Transphobia and oppression-a more last frontier

Why is it okay to communicate confusion and dismay over another person's gender expression. I mean, not only to feel strangely about a gender-different person, but actually express that discomfort to said person, e.g., "I'm having a hard time with your pronouns", "I can't wrap my head around your gender expression", "I'm trying really hard, I am-but I just don't get it", "I'm really struggling with you pronouns","Just keep correcting me if I call you she". This list could go on longer.